On your birthday, does the internal monologue run a little something like this?
“I am fierce! FIERCE! You bought that cake for me, right?! Of course you did! It’s my day. I can eat the whole thing if I want to. Yum-my! Costco makes a mean sheet cake and it is all mine…no, you can’t have any. Get your grubby stubs off my cake! Whew, close one. That kid almost got a bite of my cake but I showed her…ooh presents! For me??? Aw, man, that kid is back and eyeing my cake. Hands off!”